Happy Vampires: Truth and Teeth

Once upon a time, I wanted to be a vampire for Halloween. Of course I wanted to be a vampire. I had a natural set of extra canines sticking out of my gums above and to the sides of my incisors. I had two auspicious moles about two inches apart on my neck. I had kids at school earnestly believing that I was, in fact, a young minion of death. It was fun. So, I wanted to be a vampire*.

My parents permitted. Halloween is about dressing up and having creative fun. So I dressed up, donned my cape, donned my white shirt and red sash, and... in a moment of nervous angst before the Methodist Church "Halloween Party", I allowed my DAD (yes, my Dad) to administer the make-up. Good grief. What does DAD know about make-up? .... Dang, he did a great job. I looked so freakin' dead, I would have scared a zombie. I was so proud of my Dad I could bust.

So off I went... to the Methodist Church. I was a complete hit with the other kids... for about 15 minutes or so. Then, gently, a few of the leaders recommended I bob for apples. I didn't want to bob for apples, because we hadn't had the costume judging yet. They said they knew what I looked like... and STRONGLY suggested I bob for apples. Well, as a third child, I know how to take a hint. I bobed my face clean. I didn't win a prize.

You know, I love my Dad. And, in my thirties, despite years of advice from many orthodontists who recommend covering my wicked smile... I wear my unnatural teeth with pride. I'm a Christian... Vampire. I, unlike many Christians, like to have fun and be creative. I will suck the marrow from this life that God has given me. Care to invite me into your home?

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* About Truth & Vampires: My dental disorder is not such an uncommon one. It does happen from time to time, and is more common among women. The pair of moles on my neck make me more vampire-like, perhaps than most... although, I do prefer my steak rare. Anyway, I do not believe in the myths from Eastern Europe. There were, historically, some sick rulers who enjoyed death. Every culture has. And, perhaps the ones in Eastern Europe had a propensity for my dental disorder. Who knows. But, as with any tale, what people DO with the story is another matter. Some people, today, do sick things because of sick stories. This is not good. But, understanding the truth, respecting it, and having fun with it... IS good.