Two... no... more than twenty truths

11/28/07 Note:
Not only did this post prove to be an interesting intellectual and emotional exercise, but it was very useful for me in my present situation. Having recently moved my family from a sub-urban community where we hit spiritual wall after spiritual wall, to a painfully urban community where we have an honest and loving spiritual community willing to accept us and walk in faith with us... we're all experiencing a bit of a collective mind-fuck. I had become a bit lost in the stress of the situation and forgotten myself. By rattling on so below, it helped me remember who I was. Cool, eh?

Oh... a friend from ages past contacted me with a question or two and I realized that I'd gotten something wrong in my facts below:

1. The fellow I went to Sr. Prom with probably wasn't an actual son of a witness relocation programme -- rather, he had a very Irish name and a very Arabic physique, and his deceased father was from a mostly unknown background... so the relocation story was a fun one to hang onto during those painful teen years.
2. Yes, my mother worked for the CIA. She was initially posted in the DC Post Office, updating CIA addresses from Postal Service address index cards. She had two international assignments that I know of, but retired when she married (to an Arlington Cop) in order to settle down and make babies. I love my mom.

And in other, more mundane news:

1. I'm trying to get my kids into a private quaker middle school.
2. Because he'd rather read a book than play touch-football or basketball, my older son isn't fitting in on the asphalt playground.
3. I work at a University because I'm sick of the corporate world... and a friend just pointed out that if I stay where I am, the kids will get a free University education. Bonus!
4. I like neo-monasticism, but I know I'm too selfish for it.
5. My family plays games from time to time (clue, upwords, Apples to Apples, crystal chronicles...), and they're often our best family nights.
6. My tiny little city apartment is starting to grow on me...
7. I have an air mattress, anyone want to come and visit? :-)

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Two Truths and a… what?
And now -- more information about MrsQ than you ever cared to know and never cared to ask:

I’m not a fast thinker with a quick retort – but I can usually come up with a really good zinger once I walk away. This personality trait has often saved me from terribly embarrassing situations wherein I might have found myself eating crow -- having crossed those lovely social boundaries for standard/formal socially appropriate behaviour. BUT, it does mean that if ever WANT to be the life of the party, I have to prepare my jokes in advance.

Case ‘en pointe: Two truths and a lie. I've been very boring at this party game many times. I’ve had such a freaky life, I ought whip off some real zingers… but in the moment, when an odd group is staring at me, my strange life seems very normal and I toss out the silliest things... like "last night I ate Potato Chips" or "I have a cat named Zippy." Dumb stuff. Then, later on, I'll think of something cool I should have said.

So, here’s a list from me, about me, and for me:

1. I took voice lessons in Virginia from a renowned Japanese Opera Singer.
2. My brother is an FBI Computer Forensics Special Agent.
3. I was a girl scout, but quit when they brought in Mary Kay.
4. I’ve lived in 12 zip codes in the past 15 years... but I'm a home-body at heart and I've always hated moving.
5. I miss my free time, and I often resent being a 'working mom'.
6. My grandpa invented Hogan Alley at Quantico.
7. I’ve gone to therapy with a Hollywood Psychologist.
8. I've been to Fishnet, Creation, and Cornerstone - but I missed Soul Fest.
9. I once owned an Iguana named Maximilian Weber Draco.
10. My father-in-law is a (recovering) crack-addict.
11. I’ve peed in bushes.
12. I’ve been the only female in many Ultimate Frisbee games.
13. The president of Goshen College used to be my pastor.
14. I once took a road trip from Virginia to Maine.
15. My Mainiac boyfriend dumped me on that road trip (and I still haven’t forgiven him.)
16. I’ve performed in bars, coffeehouses, concert halls and recording studios.
17. My "maid of honor" was a gay male friend.
18. I've always wanted a tattoo, but can't decide what to get.
19. I got married during my first first-trimester.
20. I was mistaken for a native Turk in Istanbul.
21. I’ve been to the site of ‘Mary’s Ascension.’
22. My mother was a CIA agent.
23. I almost fell into the Grand Canyon.
24. My first date was inter-racial... in KKK territory.
25. Like a vampire, canines grew out of my gums instead of incisors.
26. I want my husband to teach abroad more than he does.
27. I'm a Peace-Church Christian.
28. I’ve studied German, French and Turkish.
29. My sister-in-law has a PhD in Cello Performance.
30. I find that most Christian men are sexist and self-centered.
31. By writing the above on a post like this, I'M being sexist and self-centered.
32. My grandfather’s left hand was shot off by a rifle accident.
33. I resent being a woman in a man's world.
34. I turned down a job in Harvard’s Arts and Humanities management office.
35. I’ve flown a plane.
36. I've never read the bible (w/ apocrypha) cover-to-cover, but I want to someday.
37. My dad’s an ex-cop.
38. My dad quit the force when his partner was shot and killed.
39. I've eaten fried squirrel's legs, but I prefer steamed calamari with wild mushrooms and heirloom tomatoes.
40. I was offered (but did not accept) a bribe by a Korean MATheology student.
41. I’ve visited Dr. Miroslav Volf’s home and met his adopted baby boy.
42. I camped in Asateague, where ponies act like animals.
43. I don't really have any friends with whom I can confide serious concerns.
44. I have two incredibly intelligent sons.
45. I think that any government representing more than a few thousand people will sustain itself before it will sustain the people whom it is supposed to serve.
46. I’m a (fairly inactive) site administrator for a large Christian News Blog.
47. I have never used birth control pills.
48. I’d still like to open a coffeehouse and fair/trade shop someday…
49. I have successfully quit smoking, but I still keep gum in my purse.
50. I have poison ivy... but I'm trying to to scratch it.
51. I think God has a sick sense of humor.
52. I am almost blind and my retinas might detach someday.
53. My dad quit his Irish Cop gig after his partner was shot dead in a bank robbery.
54. I think I oughta' loose 15 pounds.
55. My husband is a vegetarian, but I'd eat venison every day if I could hunt it.
56. I live in an 'up-and-coming' black ghetto in Philadelphia.
57. I went to my Senior Prom with the son of a relocated witness.
58. I was a pretty good shot with an automatic handgun when I was a kid.
59. I'd have breast reduction surgery, but I'm too proud of my modesty.
60. I think that owning Mercedes SUV with wood interior is a sin, punishable by death.
61. I'm a pacifist.
62. I'm an artist stuck in an accountant's body.
63. I often dislike who I am... but like the person I'm trying to become.

... well. Those are all true. So, if you want a lie, you'll have to make one up about me. Just don't start any seditious rumors, okay?

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10-23-07 That was fun! Here's some more exhibitionist info!

1. I have two sons, born in '96 & '99, and most people are surprised when I introduced them -- they say I look too young to have kids.
2. I'm in my mid-30's, but most people think I'm in my mid-20's... or younger.
3. I was once trained in non-violent crisis intervention, with the same course used with Chicago Cops.
4. I once learned some gospel tunes from old black folks on a southern plantation... at a mission on the plantation site.
5. When my girl scout troop went to Savannah, GA and one of the girls was caught shoplifting, they put me in her hotel room... I think they knew I was the only one who wouldn't be mean to her.
6. My kids are too smart & I worry it will cause problems for them.
7. My grades always suffered because I would over-extend my extra-curricular time.
8. I have lots of arguments with God.
9. I have always wanted to garden, but have never had the land to do so.
10. I wanted to be a Park Ranger when I was a kid, because I preferred spending time with nature than with people. (note the irony that I now live in the city...)
    
11. I am not afraid of people, so folks tend to (mistakenly) think I'm an extrovert.
12. I had a small town paper route and would sell my extra papers for cash.
13. I used a stick shift tractor mower when I was a kid.
14. I think that most "Christian" church-goers in the US aren't really believers.
15. I believe there is scriptural evidence of Women preachers, leaders, missionaries, etc.
16. I believe that gender inequality is a result of the fall, therefore a woman's ability to preach will be consistently under attack by all humans with whom (for whom) she ministers.
17. After having lived in Los Angeles a while, I can typically differentiate between Chinese, Japanese, Korean and other SE-Asian cultures.
18. I consider myself a Christian first, a Mother/Wife second, and an American... um... fifth? maybe?
19. I have often wondered whether my inability to recall proper nouns is the result of severe head trauma I received during a bike accident in '80.
20. I love quilting, but don't have the space or the time to do it.