MoveJournal7: Tossing and Turning

Well, since 3:30 I've been tossing and turning, so here's the latest stuff:

Last week, the boys were in VA with my mom. Jim and I packed some, worked some, yelled at each other a lot, and went to see Harry Potter.

Meanwhile, I feel like we've been chased out of New England -- I don't understand why this happened to us and I don't understand what this will mean for our sons.

For some reason known only to God on High, I haven't had friends here, or family, or neighbors, or a fair/reasonable work environment, or a good church community... but for my sons, this has been the only home they've known. On one hand, when we move to Philadelphia, they might not comment/complain that all their friends live in homes bigger than theirs. But, I doubt they'll have soccer or band or school shows... I'm not sure what the school curriculum will be like and I'm not sure whether they'll be able to make friends and feel at home.

I was raised in the same school system my entire pre-adult life and I'm really worried about my transient children. The urban neighborhood in Phila has a better Christian Community in it than the suburban white-washed pseudo-christians we've been hanging out with up here in MA... but do my kids care about that? I don't know. Will our Christian friends be with them on the school playgrounds? I don't know. What's best for our children? I'm starting to wonder...

So - pray for us folks. 'cause I'm having a real hard time seeing how God's will for our lives is going to be good for our kid's psychological development. I want to protect them, to let them play, to let them be innocent kids... and I feel like we're leading them into the Roman Colosseum to be eaten by lions.